Day 23 – family tahlil, emotional/inspiring songs and another big break

Joined a family tahlil ceremony(ies?) tradition on my father side. Every ramadhan, usually on a sunday. We go to 4 or 5 burial sites in one day, and recite surah yasin and tahlil. I used an a simple pdf based app I made a few years ago. The tahlil and yasin app I created was from a booklet that my brother had printed for our late father. It was because at that point there was none available then that was close to brunei’s traditions, it is surprising to know that different countries have different practices despite having the same language and the same religion, it was only then I found that the practice is considered by some muslims as bid’ah or innovations, at which different xountries have their own customized customs.

https://islamqa.info/en/734
Regardless, I find the customs of yasin and tahlil to be a meaningful practice. For one it gets people to practice the recital of the surah itself. The tahlil, itself is a form of dzikr, or the remembrance or the self reminder towards god, and dedicating it all to the departed loved ones. While the whole practice is also a very good way for relatives to come together. While my uncles like to remind their kids and others of who was who, was buried where, and so on. It makes for a good reminder from where we came, our roots, our commonality.  and it also makes a good reminder of where we all are headed, to know that we will remembered long after our deaths. To be be honest, I feel the whole tradition is for the benefit of the living more than it is for the dead.

The locations we visited were 3 burial sites at Batu Satu, 1 burial site at makam di luba, and finally 1 burial site of my great grandfather at Kuala Belait. I have only started visiting that last site for the last 3 years. I remember my father, often visited that site whenever we were passing by to go to miri. But I had never visited until 3 years ago, where my uncle usually makes it his last stop, but most of us don’t want to make that almost 2 hour trip. That time around I decided I had nothing else left to do, so I went. According to my uncle, my great grandfather, was working in KB, but he got sick and passed away. During those days it would be very troublesome to transport a body that far, and it has always been a custom to bury a body close to the location of death instead of their life.

On a related note, at this point I was already sleep deprived, having only 5 hour sleep. But one trick I learned a while back was to play emotional and inspriring songs. And the feeling I got will usually counteract any sleepiness. Its not heavy metal songs, but meaningful inspiring songs. My playlist that afternoon was Linkin Park, Nickelback, Imagine Dragons, OneRepublic and covers by boyce avenue. Songs that I would belt out to, if I remembered the lyrics.

In the afternoon my swimming class cancelled due to the rain, so we proceeded early to my wife’s sister’s home. We bought some grilled salmon to complement the seafood fried rice they were preparing. Being there early I thought I would finally take a nap, but no, I didnt feel the need. Later that night I slept at midnight again, while waking up early for work the next day.

Me and my wife shared a single salmon. My wife decided to make a simple dessert out of some flour, nutella and ice cream to make a simple lava cake, and separately a sort of sardine puff.

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